I love my blog. It's the perfect venue to put down all I'm feeling without interuption or judgement. That said, I know my family reads this and they'll probably be contacting me to make sure I'm okay. So as a preventative measure: I'm okay. Really. Please refer to post title.
With the first day pretty much gone of my City-free life, I'm still on the verge of tears. I've been reading books, watching movies and generally sitting on my but until just a bit ago when I took a shower and spiffed up a bit. I can't get over the sense of loss and regret that something I found so wonderful is over. I want all the things it used to be and won't ever be again. And so now that words have been found, I tear up and the husband's coming in the door. He'll be wondering what has happened to make me weep. Because it doesn't just feel like a cry, it feels like deep a hard cry. I guess I'm greiving. It still feels weird not to be going to the office everyday, thinking of what needs to happen next to keep the machine that it is going. I miss it so much. And yet am so releived not to have to deal with what it has become.
I guess I needed these four workdays to find me again and think about doing something else. I am going to see all my coworkers at lunch tomorrow. A get together with a mystery guest. Something I was meant not to miss. I'm guessing our guest will be either LN or DS. The oldies and the goodies.
More later.
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1 comment:
Hey Care-Bear... Sorry to hear that you're feeling down... :-( It's never easy leaving a place that you have been happy in, even when you know that its never going to be the same. Why don't we play a game online tomorrow? After your mystery lunch, of course. :-)
Chris
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